Gum Stump Squirrel and Asheville
My #ThemeSong today is Gum Stump Squirrel, by Raleigh's own Kickin Grass, because the refrain had my 10YO son and I in stitches when we first heard it today. If you like this song even just a little, check out some of their other stuff (their bluegrass is quite varied) - Dear Sarah, Rock Island Line, Little Piece of Cornbread, Molly, Backroads, we have so many favorites.
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Now for our (final) college update (at least for this year), which I had planned to post 3 days ago. (My weekend has been a bit of a whirlwind.)
Five days ago, with 36 hours to college deposit deadline, my 17-year-old son Seamus was still deciding between UNC-Asheville ($11K/year after scholarship and aid) and Berklee in Boston ($46K/year after mostly aid) in pursuit of a Music Technology/Production degree. He worked a 5-hour shift at Local 22 that night, and I waited up listening for him through the screen door in our front room, as usual. I heard him turn off the car and walk to the front yard and was relieved he was on the phone with someone other than his best friend, who is definitely attending Berklee this Fall.
Turns out it was Seamus's first Chorus teacher and soul sibling, Sean Grier, who is now working toward his Ph.D. at the University of Michigan. When Seamus got off the phone and came inside, he told me how good it was to talk to someone who wasn't trying to sway him one way or the other. Sean told Seamus to make a pros and cons list for both schools, compare them, and then make his heartfelt decision based on HIM and nobody else. I later learned that Seamus also talked to his best friend's mother, who told him that he should make his college decision independent of their friendship and musical collaboration, which she was sure would stand the test of time ♥️.
The next morning, my husband sat up in bed and told me that he didn't care that we'd said all along that this was ultimately Seamus’s decision, he was not giving Seamus an advance on what would be his $15K/year contribution to go to Berklee; Seamus would need to pay the money upfront. Seamus doesn't have that money; so he’d have to work for a year at least before going to that school.
I texted Seamus's sister to warn her that all hell may break loose and to suggest that she call her brother or her dad. But this did not happen before Seamus requested that we sit down, all three of us, and discuss the pros and cons of both schools.
We had coffee at the little table in our back yard, and Seamus went over his lists while I tried not to interrupt. In the end, he decided that the main reason he would go to Berklee is because his best friend and equally dedicated musician was going there and that he should not base his decision on a friend or even a band mate. Berklee and NYU were the only colleges his friend applied to, and he was waitlisted at NYU (like Seamus); so Berklee was his only choice. His lack of choices should not limit Seamus's.
I am relieved to have avoided an implosion that could have rocked this family for years. I am proud of the logical, objective and inclusive way our son made his college decision and that it was *his own*. And, of course, I’m happy that his decision has aligned with his father’s and mine.
Seamus is still working his ass off as a bus boy at Local 22, and he plans to verify which UNC-A classes will transfer to Berklee before determining his class schedule. He'd like to keep the transfer option open by earning his $15K contribution this year. But he also plans to make the absolute most of what the University and the Music Scene in Asheville have to offer and remains open to earning a four-year degree there once he knows what he’s getting into.
Thanks for hanging with me through this family saga. I hope that my recounting here will help others who will go through the same thing if their children apply to and are accepted by Berklee, NYU, USC, or any other school with a substantially higher price tag than other well-reputed options. I also can't emphasize enough that, though Berklee is apparently a phenomenal school, it preys upon prospective students, selling them a dream that is more likely to put them into debt than into a profitable music career. I mean, the average Berklee graduate makes $38,000 a year (compared to an average Berklee tuition of $48K/year - and that’s after federal aid).
The following scenario also bothers me. Berklee students and alum have told us that there are more student jobs at Berklee than there are students who want them. Many of these jobs are providing music lessons/workshops/education to kids and adults. We were not told (nor could I find online) how much Berklee pays their student teachers or how much Berklee receives (including grant money) for their services. It certainly appears that Berklee is educating a lot of music teachers; and given Berklee's sizable tuition, these teacher students should be paid a fair proportion of the money they are bringing to Berklee. If anyone knows how any of this works, I would be grateful to you for quelling my curiosity. We have found that Berklee isn't forthcoming or transparent about its inner workings and, regardless of the angle, its business model appears to prioritize profits over long-term student success.
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If you'd like to help Seamus raise college funds, please refer him to anyone in NC or VA looking for affordable live music for their weddings/receptions/social events (Seamus is vaccinated and practices social distancing) and/or your friends in Durham, NC, who may be looking for an "introduction to guitar" teacher (from now until August, including children). You can give them my contact info if you have it; if you don't, you can leave a response with your email address below so that I can email you my contact info (I won't approve your response, so it won't go public). Thanks for caring and sharing :-) !
Here’s the webpage I made for Seamus and his friend four years ago 😮, featuring Heavenly Buffaloes- Seamus’s absolute favorite food place in Durham (even since he's become a pescatarian).
To view my last post on this matter, click here: http://www.melissarooneywriting.com/blog/2021/04/the-college-drama-continues-mac/.
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